Uncensored at Seven Months

With seven months under his belt Maddox Schek is a baby on the move, challenging the norms at home and by all accounts ready to figure out the rest of the world so he can rebel against it. Following a recent visit to the farm where he felt largely misunderstood and a visit from his Grandpa Hank and Aunt Lindsey that left fraternal relations strained, Maddox, known as Baby Blues to his entourage and close associates, thought it a good time while on hiatus to sit down with ECE for an up close and personal look at what makes him tick.

.

ECE: Is it ok if I call you Blues?

Maddox: If you must call me Blues, go ahead. Or you can pretend that it is 2022 and call me Dr. Schek.

ECE: Ok then Blues, quite a bit has been made of your size and weight. Do you follow a special regimen?

Maddox: Until a couple weeks ago, I ate one thing. I ate about as much as I wanted including after I went to bed and this is how it turned out. But hey, I am comfortable in this body at this weight. I feel good. Strong. If I were 98th percentile just in head size instead of length, head size and weight, then I would worry.

ECE: What do you make of all of the developmental talk, milestones and such?

Maddox: It gets old. I try to keep a little ahead of the curve--I am crawling some now and pulling up--so no one starts to worry. I have actually advanced far beyond that secretly but I just reel it out a little at a time. For instance, I ride Scout around bareback quite a bit when no one is looking. Probably why I don't sleep so well--not getting enough exercise thanks to my beast of burden.

ECE: How about cognitively? Where do you think you are at?

Maddox: I am 7 months old and told you that I have figured out h

ow to ride the dog. That is more success training that bitch than dad has had in a long time so I don't think you need to ask about my cognitive development.

ECE: Well maybe you have a knack with animals. How about motor skills? You seem to be able to get the spoon in your mouth and find the pie hole with any food really.

Maddox: As I said, I have advanced beyond what I show them and just happen to have reeled out the ability to feed myself in a rudimentary fashion. If you want to really know where I am with motor skills ask the dog about the saddle I made for her. The attention to detail is fantastic.

ECE: Ok, I see your point. Since solids is still pretty new, I know that our readers will be dying to know what you like.

Maddox: Most of it really. I like those flavorless biscuits. Good exercise for my five teeth. Apples and apple sauce have been in heavy rotation and I like those quite a bit. Yogurt is good.

Dad makes a lot of beer but they don't let me try it.

ECE: So how about your relationship with your brother? Everyone seems to be watching and waiting for new conflict as you exceed old boundaries.

Maddox: I suppose that is to be expected. For now I just do what I want when he is at school and then go back to being a doughy little baby when he is here. He does love me and that is important, but I am laying low, waiting for my time to come.

ECE: It is interesting that you have subjugated the dog when your brother went to great lengths to form an alliance with the dogs, in fact among all dogs and babies. Is that indicative of a major difference between you and Ellis?

Maddox: Would you rather have a partner or a minion? I know my answer.

ECE: Ok, before this gets any creepier let's get back to the ummm....typical questions. So, what are you looking forward too in the next six months?

Maddox: Well getting rid of my first cold for one thing. It just hit out of nowhere this past weekend and I can't reach where they keep the tissues. Longer term I am looking forward to getting in front of the computer and figuring out how to use the mouse. It seems that is the way to learn a lot of new stuff. The computer seems the easiest path to gain control of the household finances as well. And I want to increase the ranks of my minions.

ECE: What are you enjoying right now the most?

Maddox: I do like to see Dad and mom when I show them something new I know how to do. Like just a few minutes ago when I got the book and sat up with it. The look on their faces was heart warming and indicated that they are well on the way to becoming two more of my minions.

ECE: Turning away from minions for a moment, you have heard a lot of new music lately. Have you liked any of it?

Maddox: Cash was misunderstood and he understood that he was misunderstood for much of his career, especially at the end. I admire that he was able to communicate that for those of us with the ability to comprehend.

ECE: That last comment reminded me somewhat of your mother, a controversial Mega-genius. Do you think your vast intelligence is inherited from her?

Maddox: It is probably a gamete mutation since I am clearly more intelligent than she. And she doesn't have minions, unless you count dad and c'mon...

ECE: What, if anything, would you like to clear up in print?

Maddox: That I don't desire to take over the world. That is a bloody lot of work. All I want is a small personal army of minions to do my bidding.

snack time

some school stuff

Ellis's preschool has some new toys and play equipment this fall and Ellis is in love with this thing: He likes it so much he hasn't played "ninjas" once yet. This is serious, people. There has been some confusion over what it's actually called. Ellis initially said "merry go rhyme", which made me pretty sure it was "merry go ride", but then I saw a sign at school indicating it was called "merry go cycle", which seems less catchy than either of the other options.

His teacher also reported an unfortunate incident today. Several of the kids were playing with plastic animals including zebras, giraffes, and lions. Though most of them were cleaned up, about a half hour later, Ellis informed his teacher that there was a wild animal under his table. She asked him three times to pick him up as he continued to look at her strangely and repeat there was a wild animal under the table. Whoops....turns out it was a live mole that had sneaked inside seeking refuge from the encroaching New England autumn.

new normal, in bullets

Various things are happening; I cannot make them cohesive:

• We just got back from 3 weeks in Indiana. Ellis ate his weight in popsicles, but was an excellent little road tripper for the 20 hours out and 18 hours back. Maddox met various Maddox and Freed relatives and was sweet.
• Today was Ellis's first day back at school. He acted like an old pro and had no problems.
• Maddox had his 6 month check up and shots. He was super crabby and clingy. Not sure if that's from the vaccinations of the lack of Aunt Catherine.
• Also today we had our first day of me staying home. It was rough, given that Maddox's doctor's appointment ate most of the morning and he cried most of the afternoon. And then it was time to pick up Ellis.
• The rocky day made me nervous about managing working from home and the ups and downs of daily child care.
• We finished canning the tomatoes, in the form of sauce and salsa. I am tired of canning. Thank goodness it is nearly fall. Next year, I will take the advice of certain mothers and great aunts and invest in a pressure canner.